I thought it I would skip ahead a few months and write about what we just experienced here in Japan. As you all know we experienced a 9.0 earthquake here in Japan that was then followed by a tsunami. I was actually writing this at the time of the earthquake to vent my frustrations of being a military wife and to give those back home a little bit of a laugh. I hope you all enjoy this...
A Learned Lesson of a Military Wife
YEAHHHH!!! I can’t wait! The hubby will be home tomorrow. I finally got the kids to bed after they bounced off the walls all night long anxiously waiting for tomorrow to come, like it is Christmas Eve all over again. Believe me it is no easy task to keep the helium filled balloons out of reach of the children while trying to explain to them you don’t want the balloons popped before Daddy gets home. It is now 3 AM as my exhausted body finally has a chance to sit down and breathe after cleaning the house from top to bottom, which of course did not get started until 12AM when the kids finally fell asleep way past their normal bedtime of 8:30PM and I got the chance to take a bath to shave the Amazon forest on my legs, “what?”…”he’s been got for over a month; I am a very busy mom!” But I am not complaining, it is the life we chose, and it will all be better tomorrow.
6AM
My eyes open to an excited little face, “Daddy is coming home today!” Yes, but that is not until 4PM this afternoon, please go back to bed. FAT CHANCE…alright I am up let’s get you breakfast while I try to snooze a little on the couch before our eventful filled day.
8AM
“Mommy, the computer is ringing”…living overseas Skype is the only way to go. “Hey honey, did I wake you?” (I snicker in my head, if he only knew.) “I am so sorry but we have been pushed back a day. I won’t be in until tomorrow.” Grrrr…OK…I will be fine, going off of about 4hrs of sleep today, but that should be easy because I am a stay-at-home mom, which in many opinions is a permanent vacation. I think this would be a good time to mention, while yes, he is sad too he wants to see his family he misses them just as much as they miss him. But there is one think about that, he is being delayed in Guam staying at a Hyatt with a view overlooking the ocean…so may I say “who is on permanent vacation”! Now off to tell the kids, who cry that they don’t understand why their Daddy can’t come home today. I console and comfort and promise that it will be soon, but we do not know the exact day, not about to put them or myself through that again. Now, let’s fill our day with fun, when all I want to do is scream, to keep our minds off of the sadness that we have to wait longer, but hopefully only 1 more day…I believe his words were “50/50 shot of making it out tomorrow.” Off to the library and play land, then on to the BX to get some last minute things for the homecoming. I think to myself, well at least we have time to make the signs that I meant to but ran out of time. Markers, stencils, paper in hand, off to the commissary to pick out a good meal to cook on the new homecoming day. The chicken is in the fridge to defrost in time to cook tomorrow night, we make the signs which again is no easy task. Trying to explain to a 5 year old that permanent markers are not like the markers she normally use, so therefore should not be used to make a mustache on her little brothers face. Off to the bathtub to attempt to scrub the Picasso faces off my beautiful children. Kids in bed, cleaned the house all over again, taped posters back up on the wall after the 5th time of falling down and I take a bath to shave my legs for the second day in a row, sure hope he comes in tomorrow, my legs aren’t used to this, anymore and I am going to end up with razor burn. In bed by 1AM…woohoo I am making progress.
9AM
Retape the posters back on the wall again and check on the balloons, not floating quite as high but they should make it until this afternoon. Chicken in the fridge is still a little frozen, so into the microwave it goes. Computer ringing again…I run from the other room hoping to hear 4 magic words…”I’m coming home today” only to hear “Nope, got pushed back another day, but am 99% sure I will make it in tomorrow.” OK…I got this, at least this time I don’t have to disappoint the kids, back to the kitchen pull the chicken out of the microwave…good still frozen back into the fridge. Am I a fool to believe it will actually be tomorrow, nah…he said 99% sure. I can do this one more day. Play school with the kids, outside to ride bikes, back inside to clean the house, and on the road to a friend’s house for dinner to try and pass some time. Home again, put the kids in bed, and retape the posters back on the wall, to the shower one last time…
Day one 9AM,
Once again tap posters back on the wall, look at our poor balloons that are now lying on the floor…I knew the high float wouldn’t hold. Clean the house 1 more time, this time I even vacuum my stairs. Come downstairs and sit down at the computer at about 2PM. Oooh…I have an email! Open it up to find, “sorry baby they kicked me off the flight so I am now flying in commercially, tomorrow night at 6:50PM.
OK…now I have had it…I am done with this one more day thing. I can’t help but wonder if he really got kicked off the flight or if they asked for a volunteer and being in Guam for one more day on the beach and one more day of no military exercise sounded pretty good. I can’t help it though…I am steaming so I hit respond and let my emotions fly. I know he will know how upset I am when he receives this email and maybe he will at least feel a little guilty. On to the phone to vent with a friend and we discuss writing down this story. I think what a great idea…at least it will provide some comic relief for friends and family who understand the military life.
2:30PM
I sit down to type my story…now please scroll up to the last line above 9 AM “Home again, put the kids in bed, retape the poster back on the wall, to the shower one last time…” As you can see my typing got less descriptive after that because that was the last line I typed before at approximately 2:46PM, we had the biggest earthquake Japan has ever had since they have been recorded.
Day 1 of the Earthquake…
We got the BIG ONE the 9.0! Now normally, since I was on the computer I would have immediately went to face book and posted, while the earthquake was occurring, as I did two days earlier when we experienced a 7.1 earthquake…but I knew very quickly this was not one to post about and that I had to get my kids and get out of the house. I grabbed my daughter and shoved her in a doorway as I hear my son crying from upstairs trying to come down. As we both ping pong off the stairwell I finally reach him and of course…he is wearing no clothes and only his underwear! I tell my daughter to go stand outside with my neighbor as I run upstairs to grab my son some clothes, and quickly descend as I dress my son as we are walking out the door! I have no idea how long the ground shook, but I have to think it seemed like at least 5 min.
My neighbor and I stand outside as we are hit with another earthquake and the loud voice comes over the system warning for a tsunami warning, our biggest fear. We listen as the voice says they are expecting a tsunami with 6 meter waves and at first I think wow 6 feet that is huge and then I realize they didn’t say 6 feet they said 6 meters that is around 20 feet high. I hug my kids close and think of my husband and thank god he is safe and regretfully think of my last email to him. Being located so close to the coast, we have always been told that we are pretty safe where we are located because we are about 3 miles from the coast and at around 57 meters above sea level. So we should be safe. We remain outside until we hear that we are to call in to our units for accountability. We go back inside to assess the damage that has been done and call in. I pick up the phone which is cordless and it does not work because of any electricity. So I go back upstairs to get our corded phone to call in. I ask Tim’s shop to please email him and let him know we are safe.
The next few hours seem like a blur, we stayed outside because the constant shaking of the ground didn’t seem as bad when we were outside. This is where one of those scenes from the show Army Wives, unfolded before me. All the wives in our complex among a few others banded together because all of our husbands were gone. We comforted each other and tried to pass on any information when we heard anything new. Even though the electricity was out, some building ran off of generators and this where the information started to flow. The beautiful town of Sendai, a very big tourist spot for many Americans, located a little over 200 miles away was wiped out! The tsunami travelled in 6 miles, so there went our thoughts of being safe since we were 3 miles in. Then words started traveling about the expected death toll and we all felt so fortunate to be safe and the “no heat or electricity” no longer seemed to matter. After spending about 3 hours in the car with my children and another spouse whose husband was also gone, so our kids could feel some normalcy watching movies and hoping they would feel the aftershocks as bad. I spoke with my husband’s shop who said he had called there and his flight for tomorrow had been cancelled and for once I was relieved just to hear that he called and knew we were OK and he was too, because Guam was under the same tsunami watch.
That night we were glued to the AFN radio station as our only source of information. We gathered all the kids and slept downstairs in the living room and slept very little due to the aftershocks which seemed to happen at least once or twice every hour.
Day 2 After the Earthquake/Tsunami/Nuclear Plant Fires
We were all up by about 7AM and my friend was off to the commissary to wait in line for it to open to get food that did not need to be cooked. One neighbor brought her kids over so she could run too along with another set of kids whose father had to go to work and their mom was stuck in the states. So, yes, I had 7 kids in my house and was so happy to just hear their excited chatter and giggles as they all laughed and played.
Now here is a part of the story that some do not agree with, but I will stand behind my decision forever! We found out it was my neighbor’s daughter’s 10th birthday. We all sympathized as we thought, “wow, what a great birthday, no cake, no friends, no sleepover, etc.” Then it dawned on me that I had a grilling cookbook so I pulled it out to see what I could find and low and behold there was a cake recipe to cook on the grill. Some think, “What were you thinking, you need to save that propane, who knows how long you guys would have been without power!” But, if you guys would have seen the smile in her eyes, when she heard I was making her a birthday cake on the grill for her, your hearts would have melted. If I could provide even a small amount of normalcy to our children’s lives during this horribly hard time, I would have done it.
Around 2PM I received a call from my husband’s shop saying he would be in at 6:50 that night and my heart sank as I realized this was old news from yesterday and that flight had been cancelled. Kids continued to come and go throughout the day and we quickly cooked dinner on the grill before it got dark and gathered inside to eat dinner and then sing Happy Birthday to a very sweet girl! And I know you are all wondering how the cake turned out and I have to say it wasn’t that bad, a little dry, but all in all it was decent under the circumstances it was cooked.
Darkness came so fast, so we quickly grabbed couch pillows and threw them on the floor to allow our kids to watch some movies on the computers. My friend and I sat on the couch and had a glass of wine and talked about how nice it would be if my husband walked through the door right then. About 10 minutes later, my front door opened and he walked through the door! We were all so happy and excited to finally have our Daddy home. It was a very long, confusing, and scary wait but we finally had him home and that was all that mattered! And for all you wondering on how he made it home so quickly…he bribed airport personal by saying he was a pilot returning from an air show and had to get back to base. For any of you have been around the Japanese culture you know that they adore military pilots and will bend over backwards to help them in any way they can.
Day 3 After Earthquake/Tsunami/Nuclear Plant Fires
I don’t know if it because we finally had our Daddy home, or if it was that the electricity was restored, but everything seemed so much calmer and easier on this day. We started the day with bacon, sausage, and pancakes cooked on the grill as at that point we still did not have electricity. Everyone was just happy to be together and that we were all safe. Around 4PM electricity was restored and life seemed to be back to normal. We really didn’t watch much of the news coverage and continued to listen to the radio. Around 10PM our internet was restored and we were finally able to call and talk with our family and friends in the states! I cried so hard when I seen the out pour of love and prayers we had been receiving. It was truly touching to see that we had so many wonderful people in our lives praying for our safety.
I could continue on about what we experienced after this, but none of it really mattered. We felt a lot of grief and guilt about how lucky we are and realized how close it came to us and just as well could have been us. Even though I meant to start this story as a release of my frustrations about the military life, my story ends with being so thankful for what I have in my life. This is what I have learned from this experience. While being a military wife is a very difficult job it is a very essential job! Could I have handled this life threatening situation without the survival skills I have developed changing from a two parent family unit to a single parent family unit on a regular basis, probably, but I feel that this life better prepared me to handle the situation with ease and make sure all the ones I loved around me were also taken care of. I learned that many times we feel like we are a single parent, but you have so many friends that surround you and are your family in times of need. So treasure all those friendships you make because you never know when you may need to call upon them. I also learned that when many times you feel like life cannot get much worse, IT CAN ALWAYS BE WORSE! After I typed that angry email to my husband because he was not yet home and purposely did not sign it “I love you”, like I always do, I think God gave me a big shake, literally, to make me realize life can always be harder. Then as the news poured in and we seen the devastation that occurred throughout Japan, we learned to count your blessings and always say “I love you” because you never know when you will last see your loved ones.
Some of you may not care to read this, but this experience was such an eye opener for me, I felt I had to share with you all my own imperfections and victories. The way the Japanese culture has handled this tragedy has amazed me. There have been no reports of looting or violence, but instead reports of Japanese citizens trying to give their food and water to American reporters. I just hope that if America ever experiences a tragedy like this, we can look to the Japanese culture in how they handled themselves and look to them as examples of how we should all be when tragedy strikes. So, I will end this with we are not out of the woods yet, but we love you all so much and be thankful for what you have in your life!
P.S. Oh yeah and one more lesson, if a makes a child smile and feel special, grill them a cake for their birthday even if you are going through the aftermaths of a earthquake, tsunami, nuclear plant fires, electricity outages, and no heat!
P.S.S Oh yeah, one more…If you need to make it home and you are being there are no flights out…tell them you are a military pilot!
